Making the first contact with someone based on a spark of eye contact across a crowded bar can be incredibly anxiety producing. Showing your interest in this guy takes a huge leap of courage and faith on your part. Here are some tips to do it well, and with confidence.
While guys have traditionally been the ones to take on this unenviable task of making a first move, in recent years more women have been undertaking the role as well.
So instead of the standard cheesy pick-up lines women have endured for ages, Paul Falzone, CEO of eLove, offers these sure-fire ways for girls to pick up guys… no one-liner necessary!
Best ways to for a girl to approach a guy
According to Falzone, when a girl picks up a guy, she should approach him with a big smile. Why? “He wants to know she’s friendly because he needs to know that he’s not going to be rejected.”
“A woman also needs to know her own intentions,” says Falzone. “If she’s picking him up just for the night, she should show that twinkle in her eye. If she wants to get to know him better, then she would just act friendly. A man is going to respond if she smiles and there’s good conversation and good humor. And, most importantly, women shouldn’t be afraid to talk to really good-looking guys.”
Best place to find good guys
Where are the best places to find a good guy? This really depends on your age group, notes Falzone. Younger women should hit up clubs or outdoor venues. Older women might have luck meeting/picking up the right guy by taking a course that interests them. Other places that would appeal to all ages include upscale eateries, sporting events or even an upscale grocery store. If you like baseball, head to a game. If you prefer dancing, find out if there’s a studio for dance lessons where they pair you up with a partner.
Potential pickup scenarios
It’s important to lead with your best foot forward, says Falzone. Look nice, smile, have a good handshake. Look a guy in the eye and let him know you’re interested. Humor always works. Do the hair flip if you want. As far as what you should say? Conversation can start with a question. If you’re at a baseball game, ask a question about a player or the team. Or you could just introduce yourself (remember to smile) and get a conversation started by talking about a current event.
“Most men will respond to a woman picking them up and usually it will make them feel good,” says Falzone. “They will be flattered. A guy’s self-confidence plays a role here. If he’s not confident, he might feel weird being picked up by a woman because then she would be the alpha. But, if he’s confident, he’ll like it and think that there’s nothing wrong with a woman being assertive.”
5 Key tips for making the first move
Falzone offers these five things a woman should keep in mind if she wants to pick up a guy- and have it work out.
#1 Look and dress nicely.
Appear and come across as confident. Smile big.
#2 Have a good story, question or other entrance to conversation.
Take a moment to prepare yourself so you’re not awkwardly tongue-tied at the crucial moment.
#3 Be a good conversationalist.
If you both lose track of time, that’s a good thing. Talk about current events, but avoid talk of religion, politics and other controversial topics. Don’t be afraid to ask or answer questions. Have a good sense of humor.
#4 Make the guy feel comfortable and protected.
Be careful not to come on too strong. Be friendly and approachable.
#5 Know when to end the encounter.
Since you’re the one who approached him; you’re in the driver’s seat when it comes to ending the encounter. You should ask for his number or hand him your business card and tell him that you’d like to see him again.
by Melissa Chapman
